Superlardaliciousgrotescumongousbesasaurouslyfattitacularogroposus Obesity

Yes, it should be a word!  I am so superlardaliciouslygrotescumongousbesasaurouslyfattitacularogroposusly overweight that my skin is peeling, no lie!!  The stretched skin on my abdomen and massive breasts is actually peeling lightly, kind of what you'd get from a light sunburn.  Sure, I realize that swelling might be making some tiiiiiiiiny contribution to the peeling, but I assert that most of the cause is pure superlardaliciousness.  It is only logical that Boxhead would be getting fatter by the day from not exercising...I'm beginning to contemplate scheduling some thigh and butt lipo even before the recovery from the current surgery is over.

Today was fun though, and the first day that I felt a little more mobile.  First Boxhead had the weekly iron shot...fun.  A nice wide bore-needle of viscous iron serum into the butt.  As if the rest of me isn't bruised enough.  Even my doctor makes jokes about Boxhead having a "man that likes some rough loving" because of the the perpetual injection bruising on my butt.  A fatty like me needs huge amounts of iron to survive though, despite the fact that I'm constantly snarfing down sides of beef, prime ribs and other products of similar meaty goodness.  The only way to keep up with the iron demands of a body of this girth is through injections.  As Boxhead has no intention of showing her perma-bruised butt, here's a picture of the needle!

From there it was off to have my glorious hair done, a bi-weekly process to nurture Boxhead's soul and ensure that no roots are EVER visible.  Nothing tackier than roots.  And yes Angels, Boxhead is willing to show pictures of almost anything except her bruised butt and in-process hair coloring.

After my hair was done I carried on the day's adventure by trying on bras to see what size was needed to contain my cartoonishly mammoth breasts at this stage of their swelling. They will go down to a proper, normal size in another two weeks or so, but for now they're entertaining. I'm used to the kind of bras that don't really have cups so much, just a vague suggestion of potential unflatness to the area where a cup would be.  Now I'm choosing bras that could be used as a cunning new missile defense system, or a hangar for Air Force I.  These things are HUGE.

Boxhead has never been able to have pretty, fancy bras because they just don't make them in -AA.  Bra designers totally snub the less-than-A-cup people (and boxes).  Now the whole world of bra splendor is open to me!  They're so pretty.  The C's seem far too big though, and even the B cups look like a whole lot of bra, so I grabbed several 34Bs and a few 34Cs and headed for the changeroom.  Ha!! the B cups that looked so big can't begin to contain the overflowing abundance of breast.  Not a chance.  Fail.  There's a lot of variation across the size of the C-cup bras, but still. Fail, other than one.  Red-faced, I slink out to gather D-cups...I can't actually ask a shopgirl for something that large.  These ones fit.  I know its swelling, but I'M A D-CUP.  It has been well established that I am a superfattie, but D-cup breasts are cartoonishly behemoth even on my lardassed frame.  Unimaginable. 

Noting that this is NOT the final size, here for amusement are some pictures of Boxhead wearing D's.  Prettier than the surgical bra, no?  Excuse the peekthroughs of surgical tape, but this is after all a surgical blog.

Naturally, it is hard to tell how much of this is swelling, how much is fat, and how much is the metabolic impact of the Doritos mashed with creme soda that I had for breakfast. 

It was windy today, so I wore jeans.  I was afraid to put them on, thinking that they wouldn't fit over the compression binder and the post-op swelling and the failure would make me feel even fatter.  Now jeans to me means waist size 240, not the teeny little sizes that the rest of you wear.  They DID fit though, and easily!!! The binder might be uncomfortable as all hell (although less every day), but it does compress all my fat into some kind of shape and make it possible to put on jeans even over the swelling.  Yay!  I may get used to it, and then need to wear those pretty corset / waist cincher things all the time once my time with binder garment draws to a close.

Other than bra shopping, I didn't bother looking at much else.  70% off sales do nothing for Boxhead.  If I didn't want something at full price, I surely to God don't want it when its been pawed over, marked down, and is almost out of season anyway.  Bring on the spring merchandise Babies, Boxhead is going to have the body for it.

So, then it was time for coffee, and then home.  I was out for HOURS.  My first real lengthy excursion since the surgery.

Boxhead will be at home for New Year's Eve.  While I love all other occasions for parties there are few things more revolting than midnight kisses from unknown freaks.  I can't stand being touched by strangers, let alone kissed.  Unpleasant.  Plus, the whole New Year's thing is lame...the resolutions, the starting over.  I resolve to be myself in 2011, unchanged other than by surgery.  I love me, so why change?

Love yourselves too Angels and Happy New Year.  The surgical tape comes off next week, and then we can begin with proper post-op photography.

Boxhead

The Myriad Surgical Merits of Liberator Products

In response to the reader that asked for a review of the Liberator Ramp, it is unsurpassed glory.  Incomparable, I recommend it wholeheartedly.  I could not have managed NEARLY as well after surgery without it.  I’ve slept on it every night and probably will continue to for another 10 days or so until there’s no pain with lying flat or standing straight.  It is the best invention ever, and was worth every second of embarrassment and awkwardness in going out to buy it.

Its use is illustrated here:

The rectus plication (okay…sorry Liberator…but actually the best invention ever) is still quite uncomfortable, as I would damn well hope it would be.  I asked for tight, and I got it.  Plus, the major abdominoplasty incision remains a tiny bit sore as well.  Without the Liberator, I’d have to find a way to elevate my upper body to minimize stretch to the rectus abdominis and the incision itself. 

Other than for the obvious reasons (um…restraint cuffs and the blindfold angels), Boxhead is also grateful for having bought the Black Label version of the Liberator Ramp.  During the early days when rolling onto my side to get out of bed was p.a.i.n.f.u.l, I could grab onto one of the restraint clips (conveniently illustrated in red on the diagram) and use that to help pull me onto my side and then lever me up into a sitting position.  Magic.

Liberator might not have gone into business with the primary objective of supporting the cosmetic surgical patient, but they do WONDERS.  And there seems a natural collaboration in order, as Liberator has so many products and Boxhead wants SO many surgeries.  Do you not see it?? In the US alone, more than $10 billion is spent per year on plastic surgery (this was before Boxhead got started…expect that number to rise).  Clearly there’s a cleverly segmented and completely untapped set of customers for Liberator, and who better than Boxhead to extoll the surgical virtues of their products??   No one!

For example, the moisture barrier properties of the Escape would be helpful in the early days after almost any surgery.  Boxhead will need the Heart Wedge undoubtedly for butt implant surgery but also sooner simply because I LOVE ME.  The Black Label Stage System could be tailored to all manner of surgical configurations.  Boxhead wishes she`d had the Esse Chaise Lounge (aka nest of post-surgical comfort) and will assuredly need it for future surgeries.  As much as the black utilitarian cuffs that came with my Ramp have been useful in keeping Boxhead out of prescription drugs and fatty foods and in stimulating marriage proposals, if I`d known about Liberator`s dainty and dazzling rhinestoned crystal cuff set I`d have had those too!  They are FAR more Boxhead than plain old black fabric with Velcro.  Look it up Darlings, these are fabulous! And this is just a very few of a vast and varied product line...how could Liberator and Boxhead not be a promotional match made in heaven?

So to the reader that asked for a review of the Ramp, there you go.  It is the most splendid product ever made.  Everyone should have one.  They are said to have other beneficial uses until your various surgeries are scheduled, and the surgical merits are just beyond fabulous.

XOXOXOX

Boxhead

Joy and Glory, Boxhead Returns

Apologies for the absence my angels.  Boxhead doesn't react well to the oxycontin given after surgery and it takes a few days to get it out of my system and get back to normal.  Two surgeries this month = two oxycontins.  Next time (and there will be many next times) I have surgery I am going to INSIST that I not be given post-op pain killers.  I'll take discomfort rather than 4 days of mental slowness and the abject fear and panic that goes along with that.  "Aaaaaagh, I'm stupid.  No, its the surgical oxycontin.  No, really, I can't think..."  It goes on faaaaaaar too long.

Aside from the oxy, the surgical drains are beyond hideous and I decided not to post any photos until they were gone, not even on the "only look if you really want to see this hellish nastiness" site.

The drains are GONE as of this morning, which is nothing short of magical.  I haven't been able to shower properly since the surgery (drains can't be gotten wet) so I had to resort to this clever shower costume:

And no, for those of you that might ask - I do not have square black nipples.  Once again, that is a discretion feature brought to us by the wonders of microsoft paint.

Abdominal photos from the immediate post-drains stage are on Lipofat and Other Unsuitable Photos at
http://cybersatanlipofat.blogspot.com/, don't go there unless you really want to see them.  There is some bruising, steri-strips covering major incisions and enough swelling to be stretching and leaving lines in the skin.  This is FABULOUS, AMAZING progress for Day 8, but seriously don't look unless you're really up for it.

Instead, you can see Boxhead moments before drain removal here:

Or the fully-clothed post-drains version here.  I am beyond euphoric to have the drains out, really!

And yes, the breast swelling will be about another 10-14 days to go down entirely.  That is not final size.

The worst part about the first-week recovery process (by FAR) has been residual oxycontin and boredom.  I'm not good at sitting around and I want to MOVE and go to yoga and barre classes and exercise.  I fear that I'm losing muscle tone every hour.  And of course since Boxhead can't do 2 hours of exercise daily, not a single gram of fat can pass my lips!

A compression garment (think ugly surgical corset) is worn to reduce swelling of the abdomen, 23 hours a day for about 4 weeks after the surgery.  On the one hand it feels supportive and safe, like the muscles are protected if I cough or sneeze.  On the other hand it feels like the death grip of satan choking the life out of me by compressing my ribcage.  Yet, not in a sexy way, just an ugly-assed medical kind of way.

Yesterday, at the suggestion of a brilliant and much loved reader, Boxhead returned to her natural environment of the Spa.  A manicure and pedicure really helped to make me feel happy and feminine again, and like a person rather than a patient. 

More soon my darlings as Boxhead returns to being out and about and able to do more. 

XOXOXO

Boxhead

Hello darlings!  Day 3 post-op and Boxhead is feeling fantastic.

Clearly I am looking fantastic as well - I can see now that the outcome of surgery will be exactly what I had hoped it would be:  a closer resemblance to my idol in surgery and refinement, Shauna Sand.  Few of you will be unfamiliar with Shauna's beauty and elegance, but just in case.   

You see that Shauna and I share massive breasts, over-filled lips and magnificent false blonde hair.  I recognize that I have considerable facial work left to do to reach her level of refinement.  Shauna however does not have a tiara, which was suggested for me by a precious viewer that knows well my princessey tendencies.

So, surgery is perfection.  Oxycontin is an epic bust as a pain killer and as a weight loss drug.  I'm past needing much in the way of pain control, but what a stupid waste of a medicine and an addiction.  I'm finding that the need for weight loss drugs has been mitigated by having witnessed, held and been photographed with my lipofat.  No way anything fatty is going back in my body, ever again.  EVER.

More tomorrow my darlings, for now Boxhead is doing a lot of resting and admiring herself.

WAY Better Than I Expected

The surgery has been fabulous, truly much better than I had expected.  The pain is manageable, the swelling and bruising is a little aggravating but not bad (really...its 2 days post-op...what do I expect).

The dressings came off today, so rather than big white bandages there's just surgical tape over the breast and abdominal incisions...looking around the brusing and swelling I can tell what its going to look like and I'm THRILLED.  There's tons of bruising so when I get the photos up they'll be on the click-to-view site.  There's also tons of swelling.  Exhibit A: breasts.  Having gone from an AA cup, this is pretty massive:

While I'm thrilled beyond words with the surgery, oxycontin is a gigantic stupid waste of time.  I was expecting a good times party drug, but NO.  How there is an entire body of addictions treatment devoted to this is just mystifying .  Granted, I was prescribed a low dose, but still.  It makes me groggy, its ineffective for the discomfort and its just very un-fun.  Extra-strength tylenol is probably more interesting because at least the red coating has flavour.  The best thing about having tried oxycontin having license to dismiss anyone that gets addicted to it as complete idiots.  Tramacet works perfect though, I recommend it highly as a no-fuss pain med.

The internal muscle (rectus abdominis) plication has to have been VERY well done, as I am walking bent over like a little old lady - I can't stand straight yet as the internal stitches are doing such a good job of tightening the muscle.  Yay!  That usually lasts for about a week.

Anyway, more updates and pictures later today. Boxhead is working on a new look to go with her awesome new body.

And Furthermore

Additional proof for those of you that continue to resist the facts of Boxhead's obsesity.  You will remember the pre-operative fatbastard weight of 105.  The post-operative weight is shown here:

So, not the 92.1 lbs that I'd estimated if the total permissible amount of fat was liposuctioned from my huge carcass.  But there will be some swelling / fluid volume retention in the above, so its not bad considering.  105 + 1.3 lbs in new breasts - 7.3 in skin and liposuctioned blubber = 99. 

Now those little opiate painkiller beauties can do their job and by January I'll be much less of a fatf*ck.

Yay.

Love,

Boxhead

Infidel Unbelievers and Boxhead's Obesity

DO NOT follow this link if you are squeamish or disturbed by pictures of lipofat or removed abdominal skin in a bag.

However, if you are one of the delusional that claimed that Boxhead was not in fact a morbidly obese superfattie, here you go babies!!! Proof positive that you were wrong and I was right!!!  Superfattie.

http://cybersatanlipofat.blogspot.com/